Am I Worthy?

As most of you know, the Gilbert Temple is now open! And will be dedicated next week!! Super exciting, and I loved being able to go through it during the open house. 

 Absolute STUNNER of a building, am I right?  

I was sitting at church a couple weeks ago, and for some reason, started to think about the temple recommend questions one gets asked when they're of age and maturity to go through the temple. (Whether for baptisms or our own endowments).  You're asked questions like whether you believe in Jesus Christ and our Heavenly Father, if you have a testimony that Joseph Smith was a prophet and if you have a testimony of the Book of Mormon, etc.  But there's one question that I kept coming back to.  Where you're asked if YOU think you're worthy to enter into the House of the Lord, to partake of those sacred covenants, and participate in the wonderful ordinances that take place there.

AM I WORTHY?

For some unknown reason, this question has been on my mind a lot!  Dictionary.com states the adjective 'worthy' as "Having adequate or great merit, character, or value."  Am I worthy?  The noun 'worth', again from dictionary.com, is "Excellence of character or quality as commanding esteem."  The example was "women of worth."  Am I worthy?

Am I worthy of being described as a woman of worth?  Am I worthy of being a friend, sister, daughter, aunt, niece, granddaughter, and neighbor to those around me?  Am I worthy, when the time comes, to be a mother to some of God's precious children?  Am I worthy to help lead the women in my ward?  Am I worthy to stand and teach them some of the principles of the Gospel?  Am I worthy for Christ to have suffered for my sins and afflictions and then die on the cross for me?  Am I worthy to go into the temple; the House of the Lord?

Folks, I may not be worthy of all those things, that's true, but I realized something. 

I am WORTH it.

I am! And so are you!!  We are all worth it in the eyes of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.  We were worth His pain and suffering while he was in the Garden.  What makes that worth any different now than back then?

You are worth all the happiness in the world, and then some!  And not only that, but you deserve all the happiness in the world.  You deserve to know how much Christ and our Heavenly Father loves you.  You are worth all the love they can give you.  And trust me, they can give quite a lot!  I have found so much peace and confidence by remembering that I have a whole team of angels on my side.  And realizing that helps me to remember my infinite worth.  We are all so amazing in different ways!  We all have a cheering section up in the heavens that is PACKED with people rooting for us!  Do you think they believe we're not worthy of their support and love?  
Whenever life gets you down, just remember: you ARE worth it.  You all have INFINITE worth in the eternal eyes of our Lord.  Don't give up!  You might not be worthy at the moment, but you sure are worth it. 

Happy Birthday

No, today is not my day of birth.  At least, not in the physical sense.  Today is my 2year anniversary of moving back home. 

 Two years ago, I was sitting in the back of my mom's mini van, driving on the 87, headed back to the AZ.  Two years ago, I was terrified out of my mind.  I wasn't supposed to be going back home!  I was supposed to still be at school, getting my Paralegal certification.  I was supposed to be living life, maybe finding a cutie to marry, and ready to start my career in law.  

WELL. 

That didn't happen, obviously, and I am so happy my life didn't turn out the way I imagined!!

I'll be honest.  There have been times where life has kind of sucked.  There were many times when I just wasn't happy at all.  I would often wonder WHY.  Why did I come back to Arizona?  Why did I drop my life in Utah to come back to this??  This isn't any easier than it was in Utah!  At least in Utah I could 'be myself'.  Let me tell you something: living a life of sin, being unable to look anyone in the eye because of how guilty you feel (ALL THE TIME), is not 'being yourself'.  It's taken me two years to realize this.  I've learned that I am the most comfortable being myself when I'm around people who lift me up.  And where else can I find those people than in my own home?  I've learned recently that nothing should ever come between you and your family.  Without my family, I wouldn't be here today.  I wouldn't be in Arizona, and I most certainly would not be happier than I've been in years.

So yes, these two years have been FULL of trial, heartache, pain, and tears.  Many, many tears.  But I've been able to experience, first hand, the saving power of Christ's Atonement.  In the past two years, I have learned who I really am.  And who I WANT to be.  I've learned more in the past two years than I have my entire life.  I've learned that through the wonderful act of repentance, that we can get back to Christ.  Yes, it will be difficult.  And yes, it may take a long time.  But how amazing is it that no matter how far you've gone astray, that you CAN COME BACK.  If I've learned anything in the past 20 years of life, it's that you aren't truly living until you're living with the Light of Christ in you.  Two years ago, today, I found out that I wasn't living.  I was merely existing.  So today, I'm celebrating my second birthday.  I am 2 years old, and I can't wait to grow old with my Savior; to learn all that He has in store for me, and to be able to teach His love to those around me.
I encourage all of you to focus on having Christ's light in you.  Strive to be like Him.  Be a light unto others that they may be able to experience true life and true joy.  We can do this, guys.  (: